Note to self:

Just F* relax!
You can't control everything.
Just go with it.
Be kind to others.

The sad girl at the wedding.

She cries on the pictures and she cries in the bathroom. She invents silly reasons. Boyfriend stays astern. He’s the brother of the groom. Busy with the music. Busy with the uncles and hants. And I am that girl.
They don't know why she was crying. H*ll. She doesn't know why she's crying.

So she said.
She said it was because she was nostalgic. All those old friends. 15 pounds. Are you pregnant?

There's many things she is crying for.

The woman with the baby kissed the tears away. Without a word. That woman. She is forever grateful to. And then she stopped.

Agro girl.

It's just the lill things in life.

Well, it's just a very very ugly bad trait I got: I get angry. A lot.

I am frustrated at work and I have a hard time keeping my cool. I whine I whine, I sigh, I swear even [doh]. I tell the world how this is ridiculous. Create a bbig ball of stress. Include as much people as possible in it.

And then I worry that I went overbboard.
I hate that feeling. Yes, well...

I a just negative.
I'm a negative person, they tell me.
And that pisses me off even more!

Take it all on my shoulders,
and think others don't care.
Clients have silly requests.
And I just feel trap into doing more OVERTIME
and feeling responsible for projects going a-wire.

You would think it would be simple.
but it's not.
People say: "just relax".

Well, I can't. Or rather it is very difficult for me.

I just think I've got the fighter gene cranked up a lill to high. Just like my father. And I have to remind myself all the time that people arent' doing this and that 'just cuz they're idiots' And it's really not the end of the world. I can do good even if I don't agree. They may want to do good too, EVEN if I don't agree.

AND I am NOT ALWAYS right.
but don't remind me...cus that pisses me off even more.

I tell you. It is pretty embarassing to feel 'angry' in the North American world. Well I feel angry a lot. I am frustrated a lot. Agro grrrrrrrrrrrrr. There. Now you know world.

Well, I am ok at feeling anger. I just wonder how I can learn more and more how to not create bad vibe around me.

good luck to me.